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What's Love to a Sorceress?

Nicole Silvestri

New Member
Short Intro: "What is this?"
This is a small mini-series I'm writing as an exploration of how a person's experience of love might be altered by a world where magic is both real and readily available.

It was inspired by my character's recent breakup, and one of my reasons for writing it was that I didn't want my character to go crying to all her PC friends about her breakup. Normally I prefer role-playing things out, but breakups are overdone to death in TSW, in my opinion. Still, nobody goes through a breakup without crying on someone's shoulder, so this way she gets to cry at NPCs, and I get to use that to do my little exploration of how magic changes love!
 
OP
Nicole Silvestri

Nicole Silvestri

New Member
Counterpoints

The fragile strands of anima that crawled at the edges of the intricate six-dimensional network forming the structure of the spell began to unravel. The sorceress howled, perhaps from anger or from sorrow or just from frustration, who could say?

Too much depended on this spell, and it was difficult enough sustaining it against the aetheric winds that swept the corridors of spacetime already. Difficult enough without another mage actively trying to annul her conjuration.

Grinding her teeth, she tried to anchor the filaments. The interference simply slipped around her reinforcements, effortlessly finding the weaker links to disjoin. She screamed. That shouldn't be possible, not so easily, not unless the saboteur had intimate familiarity with her channelling methods.

But the sorceress knew this mage didn't just have that, but the additional advantage of using her own anima against her. "Damn you, Justine, stay out of this!" she grumbled through clenched teeth as she tried to focus on siphoning away the disjunction effect itself.

Yet before she could gather her focus, it was as if someone stabbed a needle directly into her concentration. Just a small needle, but it pierced her mind's clarity all the same. Maintaining her incantation against natural fluctuations and deliberate disturbances, while also attacking the disruption directly, was too much for her brain, once the mindscramble hit her.

The spell network came apart before her third eye. Through her clouded mind she could only watch and curse in helpless frustration. "And you too, Jayden..." That must mean they were all out there.

A conclusion that was confirmed the next moment when armour-piercing bullets struck the pivots of the steel door, and a thunderbolt blew it out of its hinges. A sledgehammer with runes shimmering across its steel head finished the break-in in several thunderous blows.

They all stormed in over the ruined door, breaching and entering her sanctum, the tall woman wielding the hammer in front. The sorceress collapsed to her knees before they even reached her. Her invocation had exhausted her.

All her power was in the weave that was now rapidly unraveling all around her. Anima funneling into the wards that did what they were designed to do; diverting stray magic, deflecting rogue sorcery.

Their enchantments struggled to contain the vestiges of what she'd wrought. But held. Barely. Small shards of esoteric aberration slipped through the cracks and escaped into the rest of the building.

Security drones would soon be deployed to patrol the halls and deal with their emanations, and an occultech automaton would spend most of the day restoring the fluxes of anima to their natural state. But none of that mattered to the sorceress right now.

"Your spell is endangering the whole House! You've got to stop this, mistress Nicci!" the woman with the hammer implored her. Rather redundantly, as they had already stopped her the moment they'd fractured her spellweb.

"No..." still the sorceress shook her head stubbornly. "I have to... I have to fix this. I have to remove myself from her life. Free her of her feelings for me. It's the only way she'll move on and find happiness."

"Is that what you were doing?" the last of the four intruders asked, while stepping over the broken door into her atelier, brandishing a shimmering runic sword, a spectral wolf darting behind. "Erasing yourself from her timeline? Erasing her feelings for you?"

The sorceress, mistress Nicci to her students, could only nod in guilt and sorrow. And then wince at the gasps and shock that went through the rest of the group gathered in front of her.

"Mistress Nicci!" the woman with the hammer gulped. "You and her built this school together! You built it on your love! It's been an inspiration to us all! How could you try to erase that?!"

"Freya, I...." Nicci looked up at the woman towering over her. Looked up at all of them, at all of their faces, searching for understanding. "It's not that simple! I let that love turn poison! I let that happen! I didn't mean to but.... it's too late to cure it anymore! It has to be cut out!"

She found no understanding on their faces. They were all looking at her baffled and bewildered. She must sound as hysterical as she felt. "How could you want a wonderful woman to stop loving you?" Finley asked incredulously. "I wish I had that. Don't you remember how hard that is to find?"

Nicci sighed. "You can if it's destroying her. You can if you love her and want the best for her. Once she was on her way to becoming a wonderful woman. Now she's become utterly fixated on me. Utterly dependent on me. It's destroying her. Don't you see? She's hardly her own person anymore... just as if she was Cynthia again..."

They all looked at her even more horrified now. She couldn't blame them. How long had she done her best to hide this from them? Tried to act as if everything was still alright? Thought she could still turn things around... but it was too late for that now...

Jayden was the first to regain the composure to speak, shaken as they all were. "If that's true... shouldn't that be her choice? You... felt violated when I pierced your mind, did you not? I could tell. And it was only to confuse you. Imagine if I had tried to affect your feelings...? Even erase them...? How... would it be better than what mistress Hikari did to her...?"

Though clearly terrified to speak those words, the student had spoken them nonetheless. Nicci felt drained and defeated. She had no argument against that, only the strength of her desire to make past wrongs right. "But it... it's very likely the only way she'll be happy!" the sorceress wailed almost in desperation. "If I don't... she could be miserable for the rest of her life!"

Against the magnitude of her despair, none of the already dismayed students had any retort. Save the one with the sword: "And that would be her choice," the mage in black almost spat. "We all came to this House on the brink of ruin. Would you erase all our histories to save us? Or is your Desi worth more than us?"

Now it was Nicci's turn to gape, aghast. But Justine wasn't finished yet. "You know how I became who I am now! Will you delete all that for me? All the terrible things that turned me into this terrible woman whom half the House despises? Turn me back into the bright-eyed optimistic archmage in training I was? I was happy then, you know. I might never be that happy again, now. Unless you delete all that for me."

An exhausted Nicci could only stammer under her student's expectant look. "I thought... you considered the you from back then... hopelessly naive...?"

"I do," was the reply. "Because she was. Because I was. And what about you, mistress Nicci? How many lovers have broken your heart and left you on the brink of despair? How many of them would you want erased?"

Her students had her. Nicci sunk to the floor completely, laying herself down on the bare concrete of her arcanist workshop. "None..." she sighed, crushed. "Without the experience, I'd make the same mistake again...." she knew the words sealed her own defeat. Sealed the finality of her failure.

"Love is a crutch," Justine spat, knowing she'd won, driving her point home. "You made Desi dependent on her crutch. She won't learn to walk without it if you just make her look for a new crutch." With that, the mage student walked from the room, her spectral wolf in tow, her walk as disgusted as her voice, and all the other students gaping at her in horror.

Somewhere below her pain, Nicci remembered bitterly this was why she kept Justine around. Sometimes the black mage was the only one unafraid or uncaring enough to say such harsh words. Nicci felt far more affection for her other students, but that was mutual, and meant that in situations like these, her other students were as affected and dismayed as she was. Too emotional themselves to stand up to her.

Still, she was very glad for their affection when the three of them picked her off the floor and carried her to a couch, and even more so when they held her and told her everything would be alright. She needed that at least as much as she needed the harsh words, and perhaps more so.
 
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Nicole Silvestri

Nicole Silvestri

New Member
Roof over my World

"Desi and I had a fight and we... separated..."

"Oh... honey!"

To my relief, Mom immediately lunged forward and took me into a tight hug. Dad waited only a moment longer, seeking eye-contact first, then embraced us both. A small fortune my eyes are normal again.

It was a huge relief that was still their first reaction. Even if the couple knew their daughter's long history of messing up relationships. ("Two years, at least you broke your record?" Dad would joke a few moments later, trying to lighten the mood.)

Even if for the last four years now they'd barely seen - or known - their daughter anymore. Not since a Bee had visited her, unbeknownst to them. As far as they knew, she'd been backpacking across Japan, then gotten a job at a multinational corporation.

Since about a year they'd been convinced their daughter had gotten involved in shady businesses, after she'd been unable to keep the secret completely anymore. And on every monthly visit since there'd been tension around the dinner table; them wanting to ask, her not wanting to tell.

But that was still their first reaction. To hug her when she was heartbroken. Thank Gaia.

I let go, trusting the wards would hold, and simply cried in their comforting arms. Once again.


* * *

The sun rises pale from behind the mountain. Its rays light up the valleys below and the wispy clouds above. Over another mountain, I just manage to catch a glimpse of a large mythical bird. This would definitely have reminded Nicole of Pokemon.

But here, Nicole Silvestri seems very far away. Here I am purely the sorceress. Here I must be an extension of Gaia. A conduit for the earth's anima. Without that connection, I'd never be able to withstand the cold, or the thin air. Nicole would never have been able to.

But then she would never have come here in her life. I would never have, if not for that bee. Or... would she have some day in a wild fancy...? No, probably not, it's not easy to come here, for a norm. It takes dedication I never had. I never even made it to Japan, and that's so much easier.

Out here, my sight is clearer. Tibet, the 'Roof of the World'. Turns out, they don't call it that just because it's so high above sea level. Ever wondered why this area has so many mystical connotations? Shambhala, Shangri-La, sky-iron, Dzi stones, cradle of Taoism and Buddhism.

I never did. I'm not the type to wonder about things that don't affect me. At least not seriously. Only as a passing fancy. I probably wondered about it often as a passing fancy, that was forgotten the next day. I'm totally that type.

This place... it turns out it's somehow the mystical roof from the world. From here, you can see the whole word. Mystically, at least. Sort of. Some sort of convergence of ley lines? I'll leave that to the gnostics. I'm a sorceress, not a wizard. What works, works.
* * *

"I'm doing it again! Running away from someone who needs me!"

They'd moved to the couch in the living room. Mom sitting next to her, Dad kneeling in front of the couch.

"Honey... we want to help... but we don't know what to say... we don't know what's going on... we barely knew Desiree... or what you two did..."

There it is again. Already prying again for what I'm hiding. I so hoped they wouldn't. Must they do this still, even NOW?

"I told you! We worked for the charity division of a multinational corporation! Schooling branch, medical branch, technology developmentAAAGH IT DOESN'T MATTER I'M LEAVING HER TO DIE ALONE!"

Her parents exchanged a look. At least they still knew their daughter's outbursts enough to know not to pursue this subject.

"Is she dying?" her father asked, straightforwardly.

"She may be..." the sorceress replied hesitantly. How could she explain to them? How much could she tell them?

"She may be? You mean you've lost touch with her so she might be... for all you know?" Dad was an engineer, asking until he'd established exactly what the problem was, his job.

"Nonono!" It was the daughter, not the sorceress, who shook her head wildly. "She's in danger!"

That look her parents exchanged then. As if they saw their worst fears confirmed. As if they knew it all along: Their daughter had been dragged into shady businesses. It was hopeless. She couldn't tell them everything, so she couldn't tell them anything.

* * *

What works out here is to find a monastery. You can't see all the world from anywhere in Tibet. It's too big! Thankfully! I think if I saw all the world at once, I'd go mad! Madder. I'd probably forget who I was. Become entirely absorbed in all I saw. My consciousness becoming one with the world, and being absorbed by it.

But luckily you can only see parts at once. And which parts, depends on which mountain you're on. Each forms the apex to its own set of lines. Not every mountain is an apex, either, but the ones that are, always have (or had, or will have) a monastery built on them.

History is useful like that. Given enough time, humanity is like a divining rod for mystical energy convergence. Find a temple, or a sacred place, or a 'haunted' forest, or in this case, a monastery. I don't need to be in the monastery, just on the mountain it's on.

From one mountain, sending my sight along one line, down one branch I see a place I might one day call home…

The warrior dutifully waits for me in her sanctum, patiently yet nervously. The hunter tries to do the same but can't resist stalking me now and then. As if I do not notice the silhouette against the morning sky. I let it, it's comforting in a weird way. I'd have done the same.

From another mountain, along another line, down another branch I see a place I one day called home…

The hero is letting this run its course for now, and watching, as I am. The redeemed is unsure what to do. The wanderer hesitates to get involved. Curious: The warlock will soon come into play. The warlock has not been in play for some time. A small hopeful note.

From yet another mountain, down one branch of yet another line, I see a place I this day call home…

The black mage is probably the only one happy with this situation. The firebrand is trying to keep a cool head and a warm heart. The playboy is so conflicted he's in danger of relapsing. I better keep an eye on that. The mentalist is keeping them together, and will, for now.

* * *

"Is there anything you can do to help her?" Dad's tone had changed. It was less comforting now, and more grave. Now their daughter wasn't just heartbroken, she was in danger.

Or so they thought. Their daughter had always had a penchant for getting herself in trouble. They'd always feared that someday she'd get in serious trouble. Someday she'd get in over her head.

They had no idea how far…

And how could she explain? She couldn't. She shook her head wearily. "No... she's choosing this path herself..."

The literal, truthful answer to the question. All she could think of to say. But without context, it just made her parents exchange another of those looks.

Now they were sure their daughter's wife was getting involved in shady businesses, and dragging their daughter along. She wanted to shout how wrong they were. That she was the one endangering Desiree. But she'd have to explain. She'd trip over explanations and just dig herself a deeper hole.

And then she'd let something slip, expose her parents to the secret world, endanger them…

Mom took her hands. "Honey, that doesn't sound at all the same thing. How are you running from someone who needs you, if she’s putting herself in danger, and there's nothing you can do?"

It’s so ironic that they call me 'honey', now. Isn't it?

The sorceress tried to clear her head, to give an answer to the question that wouldn't prompt more questions. "I should... shouldn't I at least be there for her, to comfort her at this time?"

Mom shook her head resolutely. "Not if that means putting yourself in danger. Not if she takes that to mean you're encouraging her."

Hopeless. They wouldn't understand.

* * *

Harder to find across the lines and branches, requiring me to trek past many mountains and monasteries before I find her, is the person I many days called home.

The nurse longs back for her dream and cannot believe it is shattered. The poisoner is furious that it is and longs for revenge. The manager weeps for what is lost and tries to maintain some harmony.

Yes, we are all more than one aspect. I am the sorceress, the errand girl, the teacher, the prowler, the editor, and much more. But my aspects exist in symbiosis. All mirrors of eachother. Like quarks, they can't exist alone. They all try to tug the thread in a different direction, yes, but they don't try to sever themselves or eachother from the thread.

This person's aspects do. And it makes their path wildly unpredictable. When each aspect potentially can go on its own paths... The sorceress could clearly see how that made ALL paths dangerous. Each aspect becomes a danger to the others. And then there's outside dangers as well.

The inside dangers beget outside dangers with their actions. Outside dangers reinforce the inside dangers through reaction. And who was that shadow following them? Someone the sorceress had never seen on the ground. All in all, this person's future looked depressing.

The sorceress couldn't interfere, ofcourse. That chance had come and gone in her arcanist sanctum. That's why she'd been so desperate to grab that chance. Now she was too far away, both in time and in space and in emotion and in thought and in fate.

* * *

"Honey, we understand." Wait, you do? Apparently her parents mistook her silence for an internal struggling how to explain.​
Wait, not 'mistook', that's exactly what it was. At least they understood that still.​
"You're afraid she'll die and you won't be there. But she's not dying, she's in danger. She may not die at all. What will you do, stay at her side while she puts you both in danger, for the rest of your life? You just said there's nothing you can do to help her."​
That... that was spot on... She had to admit it was. She could tell by how much it hurt.​
They could tell too, judging by the relieved looks on their faces. Relieved that they'd gotten through to her.​
How? How could they misunderstand so badly and still understand so well?
They still got one thing wrong... but that, she could explain now! "Actually, there is one thing I can do...." she began. "That. Exactly that. Stay with her for the rest of my life. I can take her back. I can pretend everything is alright and that I'm still all hers."​
The look they exchanged now was confused. Ugh! At least now they understood they didn't understand?
"How would that help her, Nicky?" Dad resorted to straightforward questions again.​
Nicky was out of patience. "Then she'd be happy again! Then she wouldn't do this to herself!"​
"I see...." Her mother answered, carefully, "so this is a psychological problem, she has?"​
Close enough. "Sort of, yeah...."​

* * *

The benefit of being on the roof is how far you can see. The downside is that you're too far away to interfere. For that, you have to get back down on the ground. Amongst the people and events taking place there.

I mean, sure, you could throw something down, from the roof. But with a roof this high, you could never be sure who it would land on. It was too high to shout down at the people on the ground, as well. And nobody had invented a sniper rifle for her abilities yet.

So anything she could try to affect from up here would have wildly unpredictable results. But she had hoped she'd be able to at least see something... something that could tell her how to act, what to do, to accomplish some good, back on the ground.

Like Agartha, the lines of the world stretched in time as well as in space, allowing one to see the course of events unfolding. But with aspects so in conflict, there were too many paths. She could not see the forest for the trees, could not see the river basin for the streams. The attempt made her dizzy.

The only constant that she could make out, with great difficulty, was that her interference would only make things worse. That was the same down every path she could see. As if the very nature of her interference was toxic to the thread she wanted to change.

Perhaps that had to do with their conflicting feelings about me. The nurse, the poisoner, and the manager. Any whiff of me would intensify their conflict. The sorceress was forced to abandon her newfound hope. There was nothing she could do back on the ground.

* * *

"Honey, listen very carefully. If she has psychological problems, then she needs to see a psychologist, some kind of professional help, and work them out. You can't 'love' away psychological problems. Really, I'd thought I'd taught you better than to believe in those Hollywood myths that true love cures psychological problems!"​
Mom had been a nurse for 30 years, and had taught her daughters the basics.​
"If Desiree has psychological problems, and you take her back just to make her happy? All you'll do is put a bandage on the wound, hide it away, while it festers underneath. All you'll do is give her a fake solution, and she'll think everything is alright again, and meanwhile you're just delaying her from seeking real treatment."​
Mom's voice was confident now. Both her parents were nothing if not steadfast in a crisis. Their daughter had to have gotten that trait from somewhere.​
The daughter considered those words. "That's funny... that's basically the same thing Justine said..." Her parents' faces asked, so she explained: "A... co-worker! A very blunt co-worker. She said basically the same thing. But... the way you say it is far more compassionate, mom..."​
That got a chuckle from her father. "Just because someone is blunt doesn't mean they're not compassionate, Nicky. I mean, look at you!"​
Nicky laughed. She laughed through her tears. They were proud of her, she realized. Her parents were proud of her. That was a feeling she hadn’t felt in so long. And maybe their pride was still based on a mistaken impression, but…​
For the first time since becoming a sorceress, she felt like her parents' daughter again...​
Not only did she not know how to explain the truth; suddenly she wasn't sure she wanted to.​

* * *

Why should I go back down to the ground at all? I can see it all from up here! I can't interfere, true, but how much can I really accomplish on the ground? It's only from up here that I can truly see how little difference my efforts on the ground make, in the grand scale of things…

Everything the sorceress struggled for, so hard, for all those years, I can see from up here is merely a drop in a rivulet in the giant river basin of the world. If the world is a battlefield, she is just one soldier, and all she's done is fire a few arrows. From up here, I am the wind over the battlefield.

I still can't do more to affect the outcome of the battle than maybe blow a few arrows off course, true. But at least I can see the entire battlefield. At least I'm not just a soldier down there, at risk of getting hurt. At least up here I'm safe. At least up here, things make sense.

From one mountain, sending my sight along one line, down one branch, I see a place I one day called home…

The mother hugs her daughter. The father beams with pride. The sorceress laughs through her tears. For the first time since becoming a sorceress, she felt like her parents' daughter again.



Wait…





A chuckle from her father. "Just because someone is blunt doesn't mean they're not compassionate, Nicky. I mean, look at you!"







That's me. I'm Nicky…









I think I've been up here long enough…



Or too long already…





I've learned all I can here…







I think I need to go back…









Why do I hear harps?











Oh, that's my phone…









How do phones work again?











It's a message from Mom and Dad…













I had to think for a while to make sense of it…















It says: "Happy Birthday, Nicole!"
 
OP
Nicole Silvestri

Nicole Silvestri

New Member
Optional Ethics

“I should never have let it come this far…”

“I should never have let it come this far…”

“I should never have let it come this far…”

* * *​

“I should never have let it come this far…”

The monk answered her only after a moment of silence, and spoke slowly in that characteristic wise sage voice they all seem to have: “You cannot change the past, you can only…” Nicky raised a hand to interrupt him.

“Actually, I can,” she admitted sheepishly. And then added quickly: “Change the past.”

“OH. You’re one of THOSE.” The monk replied with impressive cynicism is his voice; impressive because there was not a hint of disrespect. He knew about the Dragon, ofcourse.

* * *​

“I should never have let it come this far…”

“You’re damn right you should never have let it come this far!”

The sorceress was stunned by the ferocity of her sister’s response, as that sister raged on: “That’s just like you, isn’t it, Nicky? You don’t notice something is wrong until it blows up in your face! You just go on acting like everything’s alright! How long have I been asking for your help now? You weren’t even here for your own nephew’s first birthday!”

“I was busy with…” What had she been busy with? Her relationship problems, probably. “That’s hardly the same, Becky!”

“It’s exactly the same! You don’t notice when someone needs help until it’s a disaster! How much worse do I have to get before you consider me a disaster, Nicky?” Becky pleaded.

The sorceress bit her lip, guiltily. “I’m sorry…” She sighed. “What can I do?”

“Can you take back the last year?” her sister asked, bitterly sarcastic.

“Yes, I can,” she answered truthfully.

And Becky stared, at once stunned and horrified by the simple honesty in her sister’s voice. Even now, even after the past year, even after what she’d seen and been told, she still couldn’t truly fathom just what her little sister had become.

* * *​

“I should never have let it come this far…”

“You DARE summon me to discuss your relationship problems?” The creature of darkness and fire rose up as its voice boomed, its arms (or tentacles? tendrils?) expanding to make it twice as tall as its already impressive height.

The comparatively small form of the human sorceress next to it just shrugged. “Nah, I summoned you to destroy you. I just figured I’d ask first.”

The large being hesitated, a ripple going through its constantly shifting essence. “So, before you attempt to destroy me… you want to volunteer to me information on your emotional vulnerabilities?”

Another shrug. “I guess so.”

The creature sat down. Or at least, performed some equivalent of sitting down with what passed for its legs (grapplers? coils? offshoots?), which the sorceress was pretty sure it didn’t actually need to stand on. “Very well,” its voice reverberated, “Perhaps it will provide some useful insight into how you humans operate.”

* * *​

It took a long deep sigh, but the monk managed to recover the slow wise voice: “Alright. I will not pretend to understand how you can change the past, so let us assume for sake of conversation you can change whatever you like. What would you change? And most importantly: When?”

Nicky scratched her woolen pom pom hat. “I guess I would… try to encourage her more to make more friends… my wife, I mean… to find more hobbies… some purpose in life besides me…”

“You did not encourage her?”

“I did! But apparently not enough…”

“And when is ‘enough’? If your encouragement had not the desired effect the first time, what would you change to make it effective this time?”

Nicky frowned hard over that question. “I don’t know… if I’d have known, I’d have done it the first time… I guess I’d just try harder, and hope it’s enough!”

The monk squinted at her, and asked sharply: “How far back in time would you have to go?”

“About a year, I guess? At least?”

It was an amusing sight, seeing this old monk literally facepalm in slow motion, then shaking his head into his hand, while trying to make it seem that wasn’t what he was doing.

When he spoke finally, his voice was still slow, but now it was from incredulity: “You are going to jump back in time a year… without having any better idea of what you did wrong the first time… or any plan for how to obtain the desired effect this time? Other than ‘try harder’?”

“I guess that is kind of weak, huh?” Nicky looked sheepish, scratching her hat more. “Every time I tried, she’d get mad at me, so maybe if I tried harder, we’d just have more fights and break up sooner…” She considered this a moment. “And maybe that’s what needs to change.”

“To break up sooner? Because she would have been less devastated, had you not been together as long?” He’d recovered his calm voice once more. “Again then: How much sooner?”

* * *​

“Would you have to go back further than a year? Further back than his birth?” Rebecca’s son - Nicole’s nephew - was sleeping peacefully in his mother’s arms as his mother asked the question.

Nicky nodded. “Likely. Just before his birth I disappeared for a while. My students told me… Desi almost lost it then.”

Rebecca hugged the toddler to her chest. “Then you can’t. He will die. I will die. We’ll both die.”

“Becky…”

“You said it yourself! So many times! We both would have died if she hadn’t performed the delivery!”

“She or another healer of comparable skill…” Nicky had to admit.

“And would one have been available on such short notice, if she hadn’t been your wife? Would your student have been watching me? Would you even have been running that dojo, if you hadn’t married her?”

“I could…” Nicky puffed her cheeks, “…could try to change the past in such a way that we got to you earlier. That it never would have come to that.”

Rebecca’s eyes shot fire. “So that’s what this is? Instead of making amends and reparations and learning from your mistakes, you want to undo them with magic? This must be a dream come true for you, Nicky!”

Nicky had dated a pyrokinetic paladin, and was still impressed by the burning glare her sister threw her.

* * *​

“I admit, human morality makes little sense to me. Changing the present to change the future is commendable, but changing the past to change the future is wrong?” The flame-being turned its eyes towards her - the sorceress was pretty sure its eyes were either those spots of darker fire amidst lighter fire, or those spots of lighter fire amidst darker fire. “Tell me, sorceress, can you make another human love you?”

“Like, with magic?” She guessed its silence was affirmation. “Not her. She’s a Bee.”

“Ah, empowered by Gaia! But a normal, powerless human?”

“Not if they were…” The entity waved an eye-stalk to interrupt her.

Its thundering voice resonated impatience: “All these ‘if’s betray the answer to the question is, in principle, yes?”

She could only nod.

“So why don’t you just do that? Could a powerless human not provide the kind of love you crave?”

Nicky gave this question some serious consideration. “I think they could… not just anyone, ofcourse, but the right one, sure.”

“So why don’t you find the right one and make them love you, and save yourself all these relationship problems?”

“That would be wrong!” she gasped.

Wrong? Why? No, no, I know what you are thinking…” The creature pointed an eye-stalk (antenna? feeler?) at itself. “Evil demon, right? But I do have some knowledge of human morality. In my interpretation, this would make both you and that person ‘happier’, so why would you consider it wrong?”

Nicky stumbled for how to explain. “It… it wouldn’t be real…”

“Real?”

It took a few moments for the sorceress to realize that the roaring sound of crackling fire was the creature’s laughing.

“Once you would’ve sworn I wasn’t real. How long have you been hunting my kind now? How much is now real to you that once wasn’t? I see the touch on you of beings far worse than I. Only a touch, lucky for you. Can you even tell what is real anymore?”

* * *​

“I think it would have made a big difference if she could just have realized that her dream wasn’t real! She kept imagining I’d be the person she wanted me to be, but that was never the real me!”

“Very good,” the monk inclined his bald head slightly. “That sounds like a specific, feasible variance, at the root of the problem.” He hid his triumph well - it had taken him a long time and a lot of patience to get the sorceress from ‘try harder’ to this point.

“Now then…” he continued, “when did this problem take root?”

The sorceress thought back. “Really… It was there from the start.” She quirked her lips to one side. “So I’d have to undo the whole relationship? Or try to negate the idea before we started?”

“Possibly. Do you believe it would have helped if you had anticipated this from the start?”

“I did anticipate it from the start!” She blew her breath out in frustration. “I gave Desi a very explicit warning before we got together, and tried to tell her again and again after!”

Raising his eyebrows was the closest this monk came to expressing sympathy. “If you failed to negate the idea the first time, I doubt going back and ‘trying harder’ would work.”

“Tell me about it!” She grumbled. “So what do I do?”

“It sounds like this problem took root before you started your relationship. Try going further back? Can you think of a time you might have prevented it?”

Nicky sighed and frowned deeply as she followed the timelines of her memories further back. Slowly she shook her head. “I think it was already there from the moment she awoke…” Seeing the question on his face, she added: “From her coma.” Not entirely accurate, but good enough.

“I see,” another slow incline of his head that was the closest he got to a nod. “Then you would likely have to go back to before her coma to find the root.”

“But that was years and years before! Before I even got my… abilities!”

“Is that a problem?”

“YES!” She threw her arms up in exasperation. “This is ridiculous! Why can’t I change this? History is NOT unchangeable! That goes against everything the Dragon teaches! We can change anything we want if we just find the right trigger at the right moment!”

Now the monk actually showed a hint of a smile, to the sorceress’ astonishment, as he replied: “Yes, but it is as you say: The right moment. History is not unchangeable, but it does have momentum. That is why so many models are needed to find its tipping points: Because they are rare.”

* * *​

“So, you don’t want me to go back and erase the last year?”

“Ofcourse not!”

“But you said the last year had been awful for you?”

“It HAS been! Completely awful!” Rebecca had taken her son up and was walking him through the living room. “I’m on leave from the hospital, I’m on three different anxiety medications… But it was still my first year with my son! I wouldn’t want to lose that for anything!”

“You wouldn't LOSE it, Becky. It’d just… change….”

“Changed by magic! It wouldn’t be real anymore!”

“Real?” Nicky couldn’t help but think back of a recent conservation with a being of whom more than just its eyes shot fire. “It would be as real to you as this year was.”

“That’s terrifying! That’s more terrifying than anything I’ve been scared of this year! Then how do you tell what’s real anymore? And what about the past year as it has happened now? Everything I’ve experienced? It would just… disappear?”

“I’d still be able to see it, but… for you and everyone else, yeah.”

Becky gasped for breath and just shook her head resolutely. ‘No.’

Nicky let her arms hang limply along her sides and sighed in disheartenment. “I just want to help…” she implored dejected, the sorceress reduced to the little sister again.

“I’ve been asking for your help all year! You could’ve helped at any time! That isn’t helping, Nicky! That is… making me forget you didn’t help! That’s forcing a lie onto my mind to make everything seem alright, when it wasn’t!”

The sorceress stared at her sister in horror.

“I know you’re not like that, Nicky, I know you don’t mean it that way. I know you mean well! But that is what it would be.

* * *​

“Tell me, sorceress, are you aware there are demons who are experts at making humans fall in love with them? They do not use magic to accomplish this. Only words. Lies so passionately and convincingly told, they are accepted as truth. It seems most humans are simply… incapable of believing that anyone could fake an entire personality?”

The tremble in the entity’s voice said what it was too polite to say in words: ‘How does such a naive species manage to survive at all?’ Nicky had to marvel for a moment at the fact that this creature was trying to be polite.

But in response to its question, she could only nod in affirmation, and add mournfully: “There are humans who are experts at this too. I’ve met many, in the Secret World.” The tremble in her voice gave away how much she regretted those meetings.

“Then tell me,” the demon boomed on, unheedful of her sorrow: “Do you consider it wrong to make someone love you that way? Do you consider that love… not real?”

She nodded again. “I do.”

“Then explain to me, what is normal human courtship, if not making someone fall in love with you with words? What is the difference?”

“I don’t lie…” she answered automatically, “I don't hide things from them…” but as she considered her answer, her confidence sank. “FUUUUCK!” she groaned as she reached her conclusion.

The creature’s fire crackled in amusement at seeing the sorceress undermine her own arguments. “Well?”

“One of these human experts…” she explained reluctantly, “I once challenged one to make me love them. She did not lie, or hide anything, and succeeded still…” Nicky growled.

“And even if you don’t lie, can you speak for all humans? Can you say that the vast majority of them do not lie, during normal courtship?”

This time she had to shake her head.

“So where is the line, human? When is love ‘real’, and when is it not?”

* * *​

“Tell me,” these words sounded far more kindly from the monk then when the demon spoke them, “are you familiar with the story of En-Dao?”

Again, Nicky could only shake her head.

“It is a lesser-known tale from Chinese mythology. Lesser-known, because the Dragon does not wish it to be well-known.”

When she just looked at him expectantly, the monk - she had asked him for his name and he had answered that he had relinquished it - began telling:

“En-Dao was a man with a minor talent for magic who somehow discovered the power to travel back in time. Some say a dragon gave him the ability, because he was such a moral, compassionate man, the dragon trusted him alone of all humans to use the ability well.

In this time, China was fractured, and not far from the town where En-Dao lived were the lands of the so-called demon emperor. We’ll call him Fang, since that was his given name according to tradition. Fang was an extremely powerful sorcerer who bound both demons and less powerful mages to do his bidding, and so ruled his lands as a cruel tyrant.

En-Dao could not hope to defeat this man in confrontation, but his unique ability to travel back in time gave him an opportunity. He did not simply want to go back and kill the dragon emperor before he came to power, however. For En-Dao was a virtuous man and believed no human was born evil; humans were turned evil by circumstance and outside influence.

So he set out to go back in time to find and eliminate whatever had turned the demon emperor evil, hoping to turn this powerful sorcerer into a force for good…”

Nicky interjected: “But he failed to find a tipping point? He had to go further and further back in time until he ended up in the time of the dinosaurs and got eaten by a T-Rex?”

Another one of those sighs - Nicky knew them well by now - before the monk spoke, straining to keep his voice calm: “You are an impatient audience. But yes, that is the essence of it. Except for the... T-Rex. As far as we know, he spend eternity looking for a tipping point, and never found it.”

* * *​

“What can I do to help, then?” Nicky asked disheartened.

“I have told you.” Rebecca answered as she put her child back into his bed. “Find my son a place where he will be protected from… whatever it is that wants to take him.”

“Becky, I’ve warded your house, I’ve given him and you magical alarms…”

“Which you’ve admitted will not help against a full scale assault if you’re too far away to respond in time!”

Nicky threw her arms up. “But I can’t guard you and him day and night, for the rest of your life! The only way to offer you more protection would be to place you in some secret world facility that is guarded day and night! I can do that, but that would make you involved in the Secret World! That would put you at more risk, not less!”

“Less risk from the thing that is after him!”

“Yes, but lots of other new risks! The thing that is after him might not even be there anymore!”

Becky sighed long and deep, in way that made Nicky think all that was missing was the cigarette. It was an exasperated sigh, not the kind of resigned sighs that the monk on the mountain had given.

“Nicky…” she began, “maybe you’re right, maybe it will be more dangerous. But at least I would have some semblance of control back! At least I’d learn and understand this Secret World. At least I could feel I was doing something, not just… sitting here and waiting for it to happen, not having any idea what ‘it’ even is, day after day, wondering if this will be the day, knowing I can do nothing to stop it if it comes!” Becky’s face pleaded with her sister, desperately.

Now it was Nicky’s turn to give a long, deep sigh. “You realise if I do that, I’ll be changing your life with magic? What’s the difference with what you just rejected so furiously?”

Becky smiled that patient smile of an older sister. “The difference is, you wouldn’t be replacing my life with a happy lie that you created. You’d just be helping me to shape my own life, to find my own happiness. Real happiness.”

* * *​

“I guess… I guess what matters is whether it makes both people happy, in the end?” The sorceress didn’t sound so sure of herself anymore.

“Aha!” The crackling of fire sounded triumphant. “So we’re back to: Find a normal human who could give you the love you crave, use your magic to make them fall in love with you, and you’ll both be ‘happy’.” This being was apparently incapable of saying the word ‘happy’ without sounding sarcastic. “So why is that wrong?”

This time Nicky had her answer ready: “Because I’d be overriding their free will.”

The way the shadowy fiery form of the entity's body shifted almost gave the impression of a nod. “So, you value free will over happiness, in the end?” Then why are you even considering making someone fall out of love with you with your magic? Is that not ‘overriding their free will’?”

“That’s not what I was considering! I abandoned that idea for exactly that reason! What I was considering…” This time the demon did not bother to wave any kind of appendage to interrupt her.

It simply boomed over her: “You’re considering changing the past - with your magic - to make this person less attached to you.”

Nicky had no answer to that.

So the creature went on: “Would you change the past to make someone more attached to you? Or would that be wrong?”

The sorceress considered this carefully. “If it was to save their life…”

“Now you’re coming up with really far-fetched ‘if’s! If it was for your own benefit, it would be wrong?”

She could only nod.

The being grinned. It had no mouth to actually grin with, but it created the shape of a human grin in lighter fire amidst the darker fire of its form. That was clearly not a natural expression for its kind - it was doing that just so it could victoriously grin at her in a facial language she’d understand. “So, are you trying to save her life? In truth? Or are you just trying to absolve your own guilt, for your own benefit?”

* * *​

“En-Dao found the dragon emperor - Fang - had been evil even at a very young age. He had been raised by abusive parents, and that seemed the source of him turning to evil. His parents, in turn, had been turned so bitter as to abuse their children from having to live in abject poverty and constant hunger.

Thus En-Dao tried to convince Fang’s parents to leave their impoverished village for wealthier lands, but found that just made them embittered from leaving their ancestral home. He tried to have the young Fang placed with foster parents, but the only ones who would take him ended up abusing him as well.

Next En-Dao tried to go further back in time to find a cause for the village’s poverty and famine, and found it had been caused by a war. So now he had to stop an entire war…” Nicky waved a hand to interrupt him.

“I think I get the picture,” she sighed reluctantly. “Some things have been set in motion too long ago.”

The monk inclined his head in acknowledgement. “The butterfly flapping its wings might cause a hurricane years later. The hurricane can be prevented by just stopping the butterfly. But once that butterfly has flapped its wings? Stopping the hurricane might become very difficult, even if it still lies years in the future.”

“Difficult…” the sorceress mused, “but not impossible…”

“Rarely impossible. But the question is if you are willing to pay the price. That is the other lesson of the story of En-Dao. He had other options open to him. He could have killed the young Fang, but that was a price he was not willing to pay.”

“Or he could have raised the child himself…” Nicky offered. “But I’m guessing he did not want to devote his entire life to it.”

“And yet he ended up devoting his life to finding a tipping point.” The monk raised an eyebrow like a teacher waiting for his student to understand the lesson. “I would guess you too have options open to you. The question is if you are willing to pay the price?”

* * *​

“I think you’re exaggerating, Becky.”

Her sister did not argue, so Nicky went on.

“Just because I changed your past with magic, would not make it a lie! It would be the new reality. If I do what you ask, your life will be very different than if I don’t, too! Your future will be changed by magic. That would be the new reality!

Enacting a change in the past instead of the present does not make the new future less real! Using magic to enact that change does not make it less real either! The present isn’t sacred and magic just is!”

Becky sighed as she lowered herself onto the couch. “Perhaps you are right. You probably understand magic and time better than I do, now…” she admitted. “But, Nicky…” Looking up, she patted the empty couch cushion next to her, inviting her little sister to come sit.

The little sister did come sit, and waited for her big sister to explain.

“I do understand you.” The older sister began. “And I understand responsibility. I know you have to use magic to do… what you do. But you can not… you should not use it to alter your own social relationships with people. Not even a little.

Relationships are built on trust, on responsibility, on shared experiences, on devoting time to eachother. If you go messing with that? Soon every time you have a fight with a friend you’ll be turning back the clock to undo the fight. Then you’ll start wondering why even spend all that time on making a new friend, when you can just change the past so that you’re already friends?”

Nicky opened her mouth to speak, but Becky raised a hand to stop her. “I know, I know, I don’t know if you can literally do that, I’m just giving examples. My point is, if you start taking such shortcuts, friendship will become meaningless to you, and you’ll end up very lonely, Nicky. Surrounded by friends, but lonely.”

The honest concern on Rebecca’s face was easy for Nicky to see. Concern for her little sister turned sorceress. And so the sorceress could not bring herself to argue.

She simply listened as her big sister went on: “If you do as I ask? You’ll just be using your magic to protect us from that… thing that’s after us. Just what you were given that power for. With your suggestion? Yes, you’ll undo my… suffering…” Becky winced at mentioning it, and had to swallow before continuing: “But you’ll also absolve us all from the mistakes we made. Not just yourself, me too.”

“Don’t go down that path, Nicky.” Rebecca implored her sister. “No matter what power you have now, you’re still human. Humans are supposed to make mistakes, and learn from them. Yes, you should try to fix your mistakes, as best you can, always! But you shouldn’t try to undo them. You’ll lose your mind, or your humanity.”

* * *​

“It’s interesting receiving a lecture on morality from a being who has none.” Nicky sneered at the creature ten times her size.

“Personal attacks are the refuge of those who know they’ve lost the argument.” It replied calmly. “You wound me, sorceress, I have morality, and one far more coherent than yours. But if it’s any consolation, it’s not yours personally I scoff at, it’s that of your entire species.”

“You think your ethics are better than ours?”

“Obviously, or I wouldn’t abide by them. But let me remind you, you asked my opinion on your moral dilemma. I did not ask your judgment on my ethics.”

The sorceress bit her lip. “You’re right… and I admit your insights have been… useful…”

“Glad to be of service. Is what I would say if I was human and trying to be polite. But as you summoned and bound me here, I didn’t have much choice in the matter. Are you going to attempt to destroy me now? I hope for your sake you’re better at magical combat than at logical arguments.”

She hesitated. “If you… allowed me to send you back to where you came from… I wouldn’t have to destroy you…”

“Ah, we had a friendly conversation about deeply personal matters, so now you've developed empathy for me? Your mind really is less rational, and more emotional, than a Rakshasa. No wonder you can’t figure out what real love is, and that your human seductress could manipulate you so easily.”

Nicky glared at the creature. “Your answer?”

“If I would not risk death to stay here, I would not be here to begin with. I have learned some things from you as well, sorceress. You crave love as desperately as I crave anima. Would you rather risk death, or give up love forever?”

Her silence was all the answer it needed.

“As would I. We’re not so different. What I crave is just more concrete. You can’t even tell when love is real or not. I wonder…”

“What?” she snapped.

“You have so much anima. You’re overflowing with it. Is that why you crave something else? Something so fickle? In my reality, anima is… elusive. I would be tempted to call you ungrateful for what you have, but perhaps… we must all crave something that’s hard to get?”

“Maybe…” Nicky sighed. “That’s sad, but maybe true.”

“And what is true we can only accept, no matter how sad.”

“Yeah…” she sighed again. Sad herself. There was only one option left for her.

* * *​

“Tell me,” this time those words came from Nicky’s mouth, “would the Dragon say the lesson of the story of En-Dao is that he should have killed the young Fang? He failed because he wasn’t strong enough to bear the guilt of that, even if it would save many more lives? That in fact, that was even selfish of him, refusing to save all those lives to keep his own conscience clean?”

“It is not for me to say what the Dragon would say.” The monk held his palms up in apology. “If it was, my mouth would be sewn shut.”

She nodded. Then twisted her lips to one side. “You just made that story up yourself, didn’t you?”

He raised his shoulders slightly. “Someone made it up. Does it matter if it was me or someone two thousand years ago? Does being older make a story better or more relevant?”

Nicky crossed her arms. “Are you just tired of answering my questions now?”

For the second time, the monk showed that hint of a smile. “Tired? Oh, no. You have simply been told all you needed to be told. Dragon models and all.”

“Right then…” She twisted her lips to the other side. “I guess I need to think on everything you’ve told me, anyways…”

“Do that. But don’t think too long. Don’t spend your whole life thinking. If there is one lesson from the story of En-Dao, it’s not to waste your life looking for a perfect solution. Be grateful for the options you have, pick the best one and go with it.”

Nicky had already begun to turn away. She looked at him over her shoulder. “I thought I’d been told everything I needed to be told?”

“That one was on me.”

“Oh, okay, thanks, I guess! Catch you later!” She waved as she began to walk away.

“You are always welcome to return if you have more questions.” Saying those words came easy to him. Meaning them was a lot harder. As the sorceress headed back down the mountain path, the monk returned to his room, contemplating the benefits of having one’s mouth sewn shut. At least, he consoled himself, there could be no better proof of the progress he had made than the patience he had just demonstrated.

* * *​

Nicky was out of patience. “Oh, come on! You’re making me out to be some kind of monster who brainwashes people with her magic! Why does everyone think I’m trying to absolve my own guilt? I just want to help! I made mistakes and they cost you a lot of pain. And they cost Desiree a lot of pain! I just want to take that away!”

Becky took her sister’s hand, soothingly. “And I will be the last to say that instinct is wrong. We both devoted our lives to taking away pain. As did Desiree. And if you can save someone’s life by going back in time? You probably should.”

Nicky frowned in confusion. “But…?”

“But if you feel like you caused that pain? If you feel guilty about that? Then I don’t think you should. Making mistakes is human. Making mistakes that hurt those we love… is part of human relationships. Apologizing, forgiving, making amends, it’s all part of forging bonds. Or breaking them. All of that becomes meaningless if you magic away your mistakes.”

After a moment, the sorceress nodded. “I see what you’re saying, but…”

But her sister wasn’t finished yet: “Not only that, you need to learn from your mistakes, Nicky. I know it’s hard. Do you think it’s not hard for me if I make a mistake and a patient dies? Do you think I didn’t wish I could go back and undo it? You actually could…” there was awe in Becky’s voice, “but I think if you did, you’d never learn, you’d never grow, and it would be worse for you, in the end.”

Nicky sighed. She couldn’t deny her sister’s concern. ‘I don’t want to lose my sister’ - what Rebecca didn’t say was clearly expressed in her eyes. And so Nicky could only counter: “That hardly seems fair to the people close to me, who suffered for my mistakes.”

Becky gave her an encouraging pat on the shoulder. “I’ll gladly suffer a little if it allows my sister to grow. And I’m sure Desiree feels the same, if she loves you. And maybe we both needed to learn something too, her and me.”

“I never seem to learn though…” Nicky shook her head with a weary sigh. “I keep making the same mistakes anyways. And maybe she won’t learn either.”

“Nicky, that isn’t true.” Rebecca’s voice was resolute. “You keep making new mistakes, but that’s normal. Trust me, I can see you’ve grown.”

Nicole looked at her sister skeptically.

“I’m sorry if I made you feel guilty about me.” Becky continued. “I should be more grateful. Without you and her, I wouldn’t even be here anymore to complain.”

“Damn right,” Nicky agreed with a chuckle, “and don’t you forget it!”

“Thank you,” her older sister smiled. “So will you help me again? Show me how responsible you've become?”

The sorceress stuck her tongue out. “I’ll see what I can do.”

* * *​

“Ah, you were expecting one more scene transition back to the sorceress and the demon? To find out what she decided? Did she destroy it? Did she let it go? Did she sent it back to its own dimension? Did she attempt to destroy it, only to fail? Did it escape?”

“We know it didn’t kill her, because we know her conversation with her sister was after her conversation with the demon. Or was it? Time isn’t always linear for this sorceress. That’s why her experience of events jumps back and forth between events so erratically.”

“In either case, I’m afraid I can’t tell you what happened between the sorceress and the demon. That is a story of its own, involving many more characters I deliberately left out of this story. You’ve been told everything you needed to be told. Dragon models and all.”

“If you ask me, this story is far too long already. If you ask me…”

“I should never have let it come this far…”
 
OP
Nicole Silvestri

Nicole Silvestri

New Member
Epilogue

“So… you’ve come back… to tell us you won’t be coming back?”

Former dojo mistress Nicci gently shook her head. “I’ve come back to tell you that even if I won’t be back, I’m still with you. If you need me, I’ll be here.”

“We need you to run this dojo. To be here every day. To do… all the hundreds of little things you did before you left.”

She shook her head again, more resolutely. “Every moment I’m here I’ll just be tearing this dojo apart.”

“Mistress Cynthia has come back…”

A flash of anger in her eyes, that her students knew all too well and very rightly recoiled from. But she bit back her anger and gave them a mellow smile. “Which is why I can’t. Imagine two exes running a dojo together? You’d all become collateral in our fights.”

“But, can’t you try to work something out? Couldn’t you and mistress Cynthia…”

“Cynthia is dead! They killed her!” This time the anger found its way out before she could contain it. In the stunned silence that followed, she hastily offered an apology.

Clearly her students weren’t sure what to make of this news, themselves. “So we’ve been told,” Finley finally offered, “and that it was necessary. You don’t believe it was?”

The sorceress stared off into infinity. “If it was, then I never knew my wife. The woman I loved was equal parts Desiree and Cynthia. So she always told me. So I always believed.”

Another long silence. “So… the Desiree that returned to us… isn’t the Desiree we knew?”

“No,” she stated it simply, “she’s someone who’s never existed before, but she deserves her own chance, to find her own path, just as if she was any new person coming to the House. Another thing I’d just get in the way of. She doesn’t need to be confronted with the woman she has memories of being married to, except that wasn’t her.”

“Is… that why you wanted to meet us way out here? Away from the dojo?”

A gentle nod was all the answer that required.

“But… aren’t you still married? Are you going to get divorced, then?”

“Divorced? I’m a widow,” she grinned at the irony of it. “And she was never the woman who said yes to me. Or who I said yes to.”

“Yet, you want to leave the dojo to her? You don’t believe she’s who she was, you say she’s a stranger, but you trust her with leading all of us? You think we should trust her to lead us?”

No” the former dojo mistress stepped forward, and looked her students one by one in the eyes. “I want you to lead yourselves. That’s always what I’ve wanted. To set up a place that could continue without me, if needed. I was never going to stick around forever. If I wasn’t going to be called to Tokyo, then I was at least going to blow myself up one day.” She chuckled.

Her students didn’t seem to think it was humorous.

“I’ll still visit. I’ll still advise if you want. I’ll still give my opinion on every important matter. But it’ll only be my opinion. Consider it, but make your own decisions. Guys, believe me, this is for the best. When I was the dojo mistress, you always trusted me to decide what’s best for the dojo, no?”

“Well… yes…”

“Then why can’t you trust me now that this is absolutely what’s best for the dojo? You want me to stay in charge, but you don’t trust my decision?”

“Well, when you put it that way…” Freya chuckled. “I’m just not sure we can do it…”

“Good!” the sorceress exclaimed wholeheartedly. “When I started setting this place up, I was absolutely sure I couldn’t do it. I was convinced the place would collapse in six months, tops. So you’re more confident than I was!”

That got a chuckle from all her students. “Six months?” They stared at eachother. “Allright, mistress Nicci, I bet you we can beat that, and bring the place down in three months!”

She beamed. “You’re on!”

* * *​

Rebecca Silvestri looked in sheer amazement at all the leaflets spread out on the table. “You… got me a place… with all these places?”

“I can get you a place at any of these places,” her little sister corrected and confirmed. “But I figured the choice should be yours. I’ve made enough choices for you.”

She felt a bit overwhelmed. “Nicci, not that I’m not grateful… but… why go through all this trouble? Why not just take me in in your own organisation? Your dojo?”

“Two reasons… One, it’s not my dojo anymore. I stepped down as dojo mistress.”

“Oh, is that because of…” Her initial surprise turned quickly to regret at asking as her sister’s expression told her everything she needed to know. “I understand…”

“And two, that place is very much on the front lines of the fight against darkness. There are other places that are further back from the front lines where you could transition into the secret world more gently.”

“I see…” She studied the leaflets again. “But some of these places? New York? London? Rome? Venice? Should I just leave everything here behind?”

“That’s your choice. I could place you into my former dojo, right here in Portland. But it might be more safer for you to be halfway around the world. And for Felipe, too. Makes you harder to find, if anything is still after you.”

“I don’t even speak Italian…” she whimpered.

“You’d learn. You want to learn about the secret world, and you’re afraid of learning a language?” Her sorceress sister chuckled. “Trust me, it’s not half as scary.”

“I guess… going to work in a hospital in Europe would make the most sense… for everyone who’d wonder where I was going… more sense than working in an…” she looked at the leaflets again, “... an insane asylum… or a Native reservation…” she chuckled. “It’d be nice if I could still be a doctor…”

“Yeah, and as a secret world doctor, you’ll get to do surgery on angels and demons, doesn’t that sound fun?”

“Really?” That prospect seemed utterly unbelievable to her.

“If you choose that path? Absolutely.”

She hesitated. “And where will you be? Still here in Portland? Or in one of these places?”

“I’ll be all over the world. I’ll be where I’m needed. But I’ll visit you whenever I can, no matter which of these places you pick. So will Phillipa. Distance is no problem for us.”

“Phillipa?” she blinked in surprise. “The Phillipa who examined me and raised the alarm? The one I named him after?” she asked with a nod to her son sleeping in his crib.

“Yes,” her sister confirmed, “she’s the one who got you the offers from Lux Dimidia, the Library White and the Council of Venice. She also asked me to give you her card, and said you could call her personally if you ever needed anything. I think she was really honored and would like to play a bigger role in little Felipe’s life.”

Rebecca examined the card she was given. “Huh, a degree in demonology? That’s... so odd to see on a card, and know it’s real. Actually, I’m surprised all these... top secret places… have brochures…”

“Oh, they don’t…” her little sister admitted sheepishly. “I made them myself… Happy Mother’s Day!”
 
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